Hi! My name is Kameran Thompson Al-Areqi. I’ve been married for almost 4 years and with my husband for almost 6. We’ve endured immigration, visas, governmental scrutiny, racist comments, judgment, loss of jobs, gaining our dream jobs, loss of purpose, gaining our purpose, moving to 3 different major cities, cultural differences, language differences, the pain of not being able to get pregnant, aviation life (a total trip in itself!), the excitement of finally getting pregnant, the roles of being a bonus parent and a biological parent (for him), and that’s on top of the every day life that marriage brings as a whole.
I believe that when things are brought up as a hardship in life, it’s something to really dig deep into and learn from. This is especially true if you find yourself having the same problem repeatedly. With us, as listed above, you can see that there is so much we have been through. Was it easy? Absolutely not. Did we want to quit? Some days. Did we ever wonder if it was worth it or if we were making a mistake? YES! But we got through it using the exact tools that I coach on. These tools don’t just sit on the shelf now that we are in the best place we’ve ever been though. A great marriage takes intention, effort and both of us working on ourselves as individuals every single day so that we can show up for our marriage and our boys as our best selves. It takes a conscious decision every morning to wake up and say “yes, I choose you for another day”. It also takes using those tools until they are broken in like your favorite pair of sweatpants from college and then keep on using them.
So what does couples coaching look like? I am certified and use the program SYMBIS for a lot of the program. This stands for Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts. I also add in other things I’ve learned about relationships, psychology and tailor it to your needs as a couple. This program is great for a premarital course but equally as fantastic for couples who have been married for many years. I like to paint the picture of marriage like this: Marriage is both people bringing a lifetime of experiences, beliefs, family traits, and expectations in bags to the living room floor of one home, dumping it all out and sorting through it for the rest of their lives. How bad do you want to sort through it with this person? If you move on, you’re just adding to the pile so making it work with the person who loves you most is probably easier than finding a new person!
SYMBIS is a biblically based, 12 week program, designed by married psychologists, Les and Leslie Parrot. The couple has a book and each have an individual workbook. You will read the chapter for the week, then you’ll each answer the questions on your own. We will then meet for a one hour coaching call via Zoom. We will go over that week’s topic, your answers and that part of the assessment you take when you start the program, as well as the page in your assessment that coincides with that topic. We will also incorporate a lot of other techniques based on psychology and your personalities and I will coach you based on what’s happening at the time, what your goals are and where you want to go as a couple.
By the end of the program you will have:
- An outlook of finances as a resource instead of a battle
- An understanding of your unique personality dynamics
- Strategies to use those individual dynamics to work as a team
- A deeper look at your “fight types” and “talk styles”
- Conflict management strategies
- A deeper connection in conversations
- Cultivation of deeper intimacy and fulfillment in the bedroom
- Meaning in your relationship with a biblical center
- Better understanding of yourself and your spouse
- Empathy toward your spouse
- A much healthier and more intimate life in the bedroom
If you do the work and make this 12 week commitment, your marriage can be renewed, strengthened or off to the best possible start you can give it. Application of the techniques you learn is key. However, if you’re struggling with one of these areas, I invite you to take this course. What you invest into your marriage gives you an ROI that is simply priceless.
If you’re ready to make your marriage into that Power Couple dream or you’d like more information, please use this link to schedule a 10 minute strategy session to see if we are a fit and to discuss getting started.