Growth MindsetMindsetUncategorized

How do you see yourself?

Last updated on: Published by: Recognizing Potential Coaching 0

This past weekend I went back to my hometown for my 19th high school reunion! Every 5 years, all of the alumni get together and it’s a really big deal. Super fun weekend! I loved seeing everyone and talking to my classmates about where they are, seeing pictures of their littles and hearing about their passions. 

As I was on the plane ride home this morning, reflecting on the weekend, the conversations had and how I wish time would’ve allowed me even more connection with some, I kept thinking about how many times people had apologized for the way they looked or downplayed their successes. 

I kept looking at these people thinking, you fly fighter jets and you’ve been traveling for 19 hours, I don’t care what you look like! You’re a freaking BADA$$!! Another one- Why are you apologizing for being sweaty after playing sand volleyball in the 110* heat?! I don’t care what you look like! I just want to hear all about your amazing adventures as a gynocological surgeon in Kenya, Congo and Ethiopia! Another one- WHY on earth are you downplaying leaving a job you hated when you’re running a company you LOVE and absolutely KILLING IT?! 

How often do we do this? We downplay our successes so we don’t make others feel bad in case they aren’t on our level? Maybe they are! Maybe it just looks differently than what we think success is! Maybe they’re just starting their journey to success. 

I know you. I know you’re working hard for your dream. I know you’re studying your butt off to become that nurse practitioner while raising three beautiful babies and being the best wife you can be. I know you’re leaving your security blanket of a j.o.b. to pursue your passion as an entrepreneur. I know that you are climbing that mountain! 

The important thing is not for us to downplay what we’ve done. If you are successful by YOUR measures, own it! Your definition of success is not going to be the same as anyone else’s. 

And for the love of summer, quit apologizing for how you look! If people are coming to see you based on what you look like (or your house for that matter) they need to make an appointment and you need new friends. 

Own your success. Own your makeup free, gorgeous anyway face and keep killing the game. You don’t know who you’re inspiring along the way. Probably other successful people like me who just love the heck out of you because you’re you. 

XOXO, 

Kameran 

P.S.- Something is coming. A BRILLIANT idea I had this morning while watching the clouds roll past the window in seat 7A. Make sure you’re in my free facebook group! 😉 

Growth MindsetMarriageMindset

“If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it”…

Last updated on: Published by: Recognizing Potential Coaching 0

A long while back, I had a conversation with a lady and we were discussing marriage as a whole. At one point in the conversation she said, “well if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.” I’ve heard that expression so many times growing up in rural Kansas but never really thought about it much as it applied to marriage. 

But is that the way to approach something of value? 

As I’ve given this expression more and more thought over the months since the conversation was first had, I’m going to go with no.

This expression leads to another one- “the squeaky wheel gets the grease”. These are mindsets.

These mindsets lead to complacency in marriage. 

Marriage and parenting are the two places in life where complacency is literally the killer of happiness.

Complacency leads to one person having too much responsibility and therefore, resentment. It leads to one or both parties having unmet needs. Mostly, it leads to the breakdown of the marriage as a whole because a whole marriage is the sum of many small habits, thoughts, actions and intentions. 

Intentional, honest reflection combats complacency. How can I show up better for you? What did we do well this week? What wasn’t so great? How can we do better?

When you only look at what’s visibly broken or you bypass the things that are annoying but not yet a problem, you’re basically saying “our marriage isn’t valuable enough to maintain.”

Would you let your car tire go with a tiny hole in it “hoping” it doesn’t get to the point of a blowout on the highway or would you fix it right away? Your marriage is no different. 

The mindset for those with strong, fulfilling marriages is “this is our priority. We treat it with respect, honor and value. We fix things BEFORE they’re broken.”

What’s the mindset in your marriage?