Family Archives – Page 7 of 8

I’ve been a little MIA for a few weeks but I promise it’s with good reason. We just got back from a 17 day stay in Egypt! For those of you who don’t know, my husband was born there and his family lives in Cairo. We took the baby to meet his grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins for the first time! That being said, I have a whole lot of travel hacks for you that will save your marriage, your children and your sanity! There are links in here but they are not ads! They are legit what I used to help my family thrive!
Here we go.

1. Talk about your expectations with your spouse a few days or even a couple weeks before you leave. Do they like to sleep in? Are they up with the sun and ready to seize the day? What sights do each of you want to see? What’s the culture of where you’re going? Anything you should be aware of, do or not do?
Additionally, set expectations with your kids. Nobody likes walking into situations where they don’t know what’s happening and kids are no different. Talk about the plane ride- it will be a long way, there won’t be wifi. When we were talking with Mason about Egypt, we made sure to explain that the houses they live in are not like ours. They don’t have dryers for their clothes, their food is different and while we don’t expect him to eat all of it, we do expect him to try it. It’s ok if he doesn’t like it (but he did like most of it)! When we are in public, we expect him to stay near us and not take things from people even when they’re offered. Set them up for success from the get go by setting clear, concise expectations.

2. If you are flying- take a stroller but check it at the gate! Same with a car seat. The chances of the airlines losing it is less this way! Plus, you can use it to wheel around bags or your kids when you’re going long distances through the airport.

3. Even if you’re breastfeeding, pack individual packets of formula. I only packed 2 and from experience, I will say that I wish I would’ve packed way more! There wasn’t always space on the plane. I got a stomach virus and had it for 11 days so my supply completely tanked and formula isn’t always available in other countries. Reading ingredients on these formulas is also not a good time.

4. If any one of your family members has food allergies, pack snacks! Airplane food is NOT allergy friendly. Though most airlines have stopped serving peanuts, it still doesn’t mean you can consume the food if you have any other allergies. I LOVED the Optavia chocolate shake meals. I packed about 10 and I used all 10 on the trip. They were the only thing I could keep down when I was sick and because you just mix them with water, it’s easy. If you mix it with only a little water, it’s like a pudding so it won’t make a mess. If you dump it in a water bottle, you have a shake with a decent amount of protein. I also packed things like individual packs of veggie straws, fruit strips, dried fruit, granola.

5. You’ll want to seperate your carry ons like this. This is for a family of 4 but you get the idea.

Carry on #1– 2 pairs of clothes, 1 pair of pajamas and 3 pairs of underwear for each family member. Roll the clothes so you fit more in the bags and they don’t wrinkle as bad. Toothbrushes, contact solution, bathroom bags including 2 bars of soap! 1 bar you’ll use for showers and the other you’ll use to wash clothes if needed. The second leg of our trip, Lufthansa lost our bags and we didn’t get them for 5 days of our trip. Everything you’ll need in case this happens, put it in a carry on!
Carry on #2– Electronics, iPads, chargers, phones, etc.
Carry on #3– Snacks/food (nothing liquid!), 2 throw sized blankets packed over the top of the food and FUN- trust me on this. You’ll want to put coloring books, crayons, books to read, a sketch pad with some colored pencils, anything light weight that will keep them busy. For kids old enough to write, consider packing a journal for them to write down their memories- things they saw, enjoyed, people they met, what they saw that was different than where they live, things they ate and liked/disliked, etc.This will be a fun keepsake many years from now.
Carry on #4- Anything related to the baby- breastpump, charger, bottle brush (good luck finding one of those in any other country!) extra bottles, formula, etc.

Seperating like this will help tremendously as you go through TSA and if you need something specific on the plane, you know which bag to grab quickly.

6. Ladies- ZYIA LEGGINGS!! Thank God I wore a pair of jeans on the flight and packed a pair of Zyia black leggings in my carry on with a nicer t-shirt. Because the airlines lost our bags, I had to literally live in these leggings for 5 straight days. They were comfy enough to sleep in, easy to wash and dry quickly, nice enough to dress up with the nicer shirt I had and because Egypt is a billion degrees in July, they weren’t too hot!

7. For kids, get 2 new toys (even for big kids) for them for the trip. One you’ll pack in the suitcase for the flight home. The other you’ll take on the flight to your destination. When they get bored, you’ll have a new toy for them to play with and it will be much more enjoyable for everyone.

8. Thieves Hand sanitizing Wipes. Life is messy and traveling isn’t always the most sanitary. I used these wipes for EVERYTHING- wiping down the plane/uber/etc, cleaning hands- kids and my own, wiping off pacifiers, anything that needed cleaned basically. They’re non-toxic, smell fantastic and chemical free. They are also allowed through TSA where a bottle of hand sanitizer big enough for a family for 2 weeks isn’t.

9. Mighty Pro. A pre and probiotic. When I got sick and then my 11 year old got the same stomach virus (not covid, confirmed), these helped our digestive tract SO MUCH!! They’re small packets that taste like a pixie stick and don’t take up much space or weigh a lot. Other countries have food that doesn’t always agree with you. These help combat that.

10. Be Mindful of the BASICS! Children and adults alike cannot thrive if they are hungry, tired or thirsty. Yelling, getting short with them, adding to the negativity and the already tense situation will not help. Keep everyone fed, warm, hydrated and rested and whatever else hapoens isn’t a big deal. Every problem that happens after that is completely solvable. Most likely if there’s a meltdown, it can be traced back to one of these issues.

11. Bonus Tip- Give everyone a job, even if it’s small. When kids feel important, they have something else to focus on besides how long they’ve been walking, how hungry or tired they are. For little kids, it might be looking for bathrooms or a certain type of food, the gate you’re going to, or watching for a man with a green shirt. Make anything up. It will pass the time and give them a focus. For older kids, it might be carrying bags, making sure all bags are accounted for, holding little brother’s hand, etc.

For a couple’s only thriving while traveling and other relationship coaching tips, subscribe to my couple’s only weekly newsletter!

Above all, I know the pandemic created a hold on traveling but as someone who travels A LOT, I can honestly say that it’s very safe. Precautions are still taken but the world is opening back up for the most part and there are lots of things to see!

Happy Travels!!

Kameran

P.S- For numbers 4, 6, 8 and 9- if you’re interested in these products, email me and I can connect you to the people I ordered from or get you hooked up from my own website! 🙂

Tired as a mother.

To all the mother’s out there, I see you. I feel you. I am you.

As Mother’s Day rolls around, I’m so grateful to be a mother. So grateful to have Zayn as the addition that I never thought I’d have. SO grateful that Mason is the big brother he is and an enormous help to me and Moe. Grateful for a husband who cooks, cleans and takes care of our boys well and doesn’t call it babysitting.

I am also equally exhausted and empathetic to all of the other mothers in the world.

I shared a post in my facebook group a few days ago talking about how we as women cook, clean, do laundry, make sure everyone else is ok, cater to all. But who caters to her? Who does her laundry? Who makes her meals? It blew up with women commenting on how they felt that post deep in their soul. I think my mom said it best when she said that we are natural born caregivers but when someone in turn tries to care for us, we feel weird and uncomfortable. Why? Why is letting someone do something for you (for a change) uncomfortable?

Expectations. Our grandmothers cared for everyone. Our grandmothers made it look so easy. In addition, the men in our lives took that expectation that ladies “should” be the ones to care for everyone with them because that’s what they learned from our dads…the ones who had the mother doing it all. That subconscious belief and expectation was then passed from generation to generation and it became an unspoken norm that stuck. There’s a big factor missing in that expectation and the societal norm. Our grandmothers didn’t work a 40+ hour work week on top of caring for everyone. Our grandmothers weren’t trying to juggle online schooling, a pandemic and unrealistic expectations from our employers and they weren’t trying to navigate a culture obsessed with urgency (more on that next week).

My sister in law still lives in Cairo, Egypt. She’s about 5 months pregnant and the first girl in the family to have a baby. The women family members in the Arab culture come from other countries, other cities, miles and miles around when a woman has a baby just to take care of the new mother and baby. They all stay in the home for about a month after the baby is born. The new mom doesn’t have to do anything. No cooking, cleaning, nothing. Resting and caring for her baby. That’s her only job during this time. She’s cared for. Postpartum depression is a lot less, as are a lot of other complications that come with healing after baby. She doesn’t feel uncomfortable or weird or like she has to be working to entertain others or make a good impression.

So why not our culture? What would happen if we accepted help and caring from others with open arms and hearts? What if we started looking at the ability to care for others as a privilege and an honor knowing that eventually we will be the ones needing help and it will come back around? What if we took care of each other like my in laws and their culture? What if we adjust the expectations to teach our sons and daughters that the societal expectation from 40 years ago no longer applies and is no longer what’s best for our families? What if we taught them the importance of mental health and reducing stress over being all the things to all the people, saying yes when you want to say no, and stretching yourself too thin? What if we modeled that instead of only preaching it?

Let’s start adjusting. Let’s start learning to communicate what we need when we need it instead of sweeping it under the rug. Let’s start praising and appreciating the men in our lives when they step up and take things off of our plates. That’s a societal norm we can push! Teaching our sons that they are fully capable of doing the exact same things women do and of caring for others in the exact same manner. Let’s start normalizing rest and breaks and for the love of God, normalize saying NO. Let’s start changing the narrative so that we aren’t burnt out, exhausted, and merely surviving but instead we are energized, and stepping into our individual purposes. We can be engaged with our children instead of escaping the stress of the day when they’re asking for our attention. Let’s start getting uncomfortable in letting others care for us so that after a while, the uncomfortable becomes comfortable.

Let’s make it a goal that by next year on Mother’s Day, we are thriving and grateful every day for the life we live. A life that we don’t need time alone or an uninterrupted nap as the best gift in the world for Mother’s Day.

XOXO,

Kameran

How to Thrive While Traveling with a Spouse and Kids

Changing the narrative of Mother’s Day